First, you ask for child support regardless of anything else. Your son deserves that. Second, it sounds like you have mentioned this to the father, but is it accurate to state that you have expressed the very real need your son has of the male influence of his father. My H neglected one son over the other and we all lived in the same house. It happens. It hurts. You can ask for his participation, but you cannot change the father. You make it clear that he is needed in THAT capacity and let the father take it or leave it. You do not leave the child at his father's unsolicited. Abandonment by you would be harder to explain that his father's inattention. It would hurt the boy tremendously. If the father does not want to participate, you go elsewhere for the male role model support he needs. I could go on because I have had to do this, but I will await the outcome of what I've already expressed first.

Thanks for your replies, my son does have male role models, my dad and my younger brothers,that's one of the excuses the dad has for his neglecting our son. He feels that since my son is spoiled by my family that he doesn't need his own dad around. But the other boy, who he has admitted to not being sure if he's the dad, he feels that he does need to be around him becouse he doesn't have what our son has. When the dad has come to visit he's asked my son if he can take some of his old clothes to the other boy. I don't know why but this makes me want to go into a rage. Here's my son trying to spend some time one on one with his dad and his dad isn't even focused on him, he's thinking about the other kid. I usaully just ignore it but I'm very angry for his lack of interest in our son. Your right I can't change the man. Thank god my dad is very committed to my son, and my brothers love him too, one of my uncles has made it a routine to come out every monday so they can do something. It just really hurts me that his own "father" doesn't care to spend any time with him. And in regards to the child support, he doesn't have anything. when he moved out I cut him out of the business we had together. so now i think that other kids mom supports him. Becouse if she's around my son can't even by mentioned forget about him even being around her. Thats another reason i haven't just left my son there.