No way Tim! It is not your place to contact the family. They are not your children and you have no rights here. You should concentrate on being there for your friend. If she wants to contact the family, she knows you can help her do that. That is all you should do in this situation.

Clearly, you were looking for a different answer, but even if you were married to this woman, you do not have the right.

What would happen if the abusive father got involved? He actually has rights and if he wanted to pursue this, he could make your friends like very unhappy.

Just be a good friend and don't consider deceiving her.

You know Tim, even if she were to ask you to tell the family, you should not. Tell her you will be there with her if she wants to tell them. Tell her you are willing to support her in any way she needs you to. BUT this has to be her action.

It is hard to feel alone when you are raising kids. I wanted my son's extended family to know him and I imagined how much they would love him if they just met him. Guess what? When his bio grandmother met him she thought he was cute and was excited to see her son's offspring. It ended there... If you friend wants these people in her childrens lives then she must realize they will be in HER life also. She must be willing to cultivate the relationship. Just because they are biologically related does not mean that they will automatically love the kids.

Just try to love her kids and be a good influence on them. She won't long for something that is missing if her own family and friends give the kids tons of love and support.

Good luck!

I know you think that you would be helping but he is abusive and the fact he has no contact is a blessing. Leave it be as it is if you tell family you will not only harm your friendship you could harm the kids as well. I can say this cuz' I was the abused and well my ex has limited contact but he still tries his best to hurt me in some form from time to time.our kids actuly hate him and wish they were my 2 be husbands.sometimes not having contact is the best for everyone. just be supportive of her choice or you could ruin the relationship forever!

Don't do it cause the only reason she haven't did it cause it's like you said she might be afraid of his reactions. I know you love her in all but step down and see what kind of responsibility she takes as the mother of her children i understand that you love and care for her and her children but she needs to step it up and do something if she know cant do nothing with her children she need to seek some guidance pray for her help her out when she need help support her when she need supporting.

Valente