dapuppies2 I'm am new to the community as well. We are faced with retaining our daughter in the 2nd grade due to dyslexia. I have searched for info on retention and haven't found many positive situations. We are going to retain her but move her to a private school that teaches dyslexic children. (hopefully they can help her adapt and she can rejoin her classmates) It is still hard to wrap my head around it even though academically she needs it! I know my brother was held back in 4th grade and it was devastating for him. That was 30 years ago, so things & views have changed. Ultimately, you & your husband know your daughter better, so you should follow your heart. If she is doing good academically could you transfer to another school and not retain? Why is she being bullied? How has the school handled? I understand how difficult a decision this is!! Hopefully, we both make the right decision!
Good luck!

Hi. My 4th grade daughter is also young for her grade - made the age cut off, but in an area where most people hold their kids back before starting kindergarten. So she is typically up to a year younger than her classmates. Her kindergarten teacher suggested a second year of K because she seemed socially less sure of herself compared to the other kids, despite being academically stronger than most. We sent her on to 1st grade because we felt holding her back would cause her self-esteem to fall even further. She had a great 1st grade teacher who respected the different personalities of all the kids, including the shy ones (like my daughter), and she has steadily gained confidence each year since then. I believe we did the right thing. Remember, kids develop at varying rates, and have different family dynamics that influence their behavior (e.g., a child with an older sibling may act older). Your daughter could just be a late-bloomer, especially since you say she's bright and funny. I shoud add that I now have twins in 1st grade, and one of their classmates just turned 8. One might think he is the most socially mature kid in the bunch, but the opposite is true! Often times older kids find the "lowest common denominator" in terms of behavior in an attempt to fit in. On the other hand, it's possible for younger kids like my daughter to find their niche with a couple of close friends, gaining confidence while continuing to excel in academics. Ask yourself how likely another year of 3rd grade will achieve the objectives of improving your daughter's self-esteem and eliminating the bullying. The opposite could end up happening, with kids teasing her for having to repeat and her feeling self-conscious about it. On the other hand, are there alternatives to repeating that would achieve your goals? Your daughter has every right to move on to 4th grade: she is bright, and presumably can handle the school work. The trick is to help her feel good about that. Perhaps your daughter's teacher expects more from her because other children in the class were held back and are older. That's unfair and should be discussed with the teacher, because she is age-eligible. Also, no child should have to accept being seriously bullied at school. I would insist that the current school take clear-cut actions to address bullying. It is not her fault! Perhaps having your daughter in a girl scout troop or sports team will give her a chance to make closer friends in her grade level, providing a sort of safety net. I don't know how easy it would be to switch schools, but will she have friends at the new school? Not knowing anyone in the new school could add to her stress, or else create an opportunity to start fresh. I just don't know. Good luck with your decision. The last thing I will add is to follow your gut instinct. You can't go back and change the fact that you enrolled her in school when she just made the cut-off, so don't beat yourself up over that. Focus on the situation at hand. Be her strongest advocate, because if you aren't no one else will be. And remember there is no one right answer for everyone. We all just do the best we can!