Our 13 year old daughter has a laissez-faire attitude with regards to her school work. Her grades and performance are very much below average and considerably below her abilities. However, we can't find the right buttons to push in order to motivate her to do better and take pride in her work. We try to study with her and have sent her to private tutoring, both to no avail. Today my wife hit her tolerance limit upon finding out that our daughter scored 30% on her math test today. As such, my wife wants to punish our daughter by leaving her home with her grandmother and not taking her with us and our 8 year old son on our planned spring break vacation. I don't feel that this is the right way to handle this even though I feel, and share, my wife's frustration. I have suggested that we cancel the trip, reschedule it during summer vacation and tell our daughter that we will only go on the planned vacation if her grades improve to levels that we all agree upon. Any ideas?