Pregnancy
Discussion Title: teenage daughter and mom conflicts
Created by: mommy50
Created on: Tue, 07/14/2009 - 2:54pm.
Created by: mommy50
Created on: Tue, 07/14/2009 - 2:54pm.
Whenever my 16 year old daughter and I disagree, my husband interferes and he tends to side with his daughter. He says if he doesn't she will carry through on her threats to leave which she has done a few times mostly for the day but sometimes overnight. She is smart enough to go where she is safe and not on the street, thank goodness. Whenever I talk to my daugher, she will not take my advice and will usually scream at me so it seems like she wants an argument so she can use that as an excuse to leave. I try to talk with her but she won't have anything to do with it.
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Replied: 7/15/2009 12:04pm.
I thought I was alone. Reading what you wrote, I somewhat feel comforted. My daughter doesn't like to hear anything I have to say. She doesn't talk she screams. It really upsets me because I'm trying to stay calm and rational. When I engage in the screaming, she feels justified and calls me "psycho mom".
My daughter is starting college this fall and her screaming has lessened. Thank Goodness! There is hope.
Replied: 7/20/2009 11:00pm.
I'm a single mom and have two girls. The oldest is 19 and doing wonderful, the youngest is 16 and hates me. I remember going through a brief period with the oldest but nothing like this time. Their father is only around when he wants to be and lately he has seen her more than usual. A day here and there. He is finally getting a taste of what I have tried to get him to help me with, according to my oldest. My sixteen year old, just a few minutes ago, asked my where the jelly was, yes this is the second time I forgot it, however she looked at me and yelled it's been over a ??? week and you still haven't gotten it. You haven't gotten the ??? jelly yet. It's unreal and I really can't take it anymore. I have tried talking, avoiding her and nothing works. I have scheduled her with an appointment to talk with a therapist for next week because I don't know what else to do. I cry, I get angry, sometimes I have to leave the house I can't take it. I have had to seek therapy for this. She is so mean and hateful to me, I really thinks she hates me and she even treats her sister with disrespect. She cuses me out, I try to take her phone she says my Dad paid for that, well I pay the phone bill. She's constantly yelling out me, I can ask her if she wants something to eat or drink and she will yell. Why is it this way, I give her independence, space, I love her and tell her often but she doesn't want anything to do with me unless she want's something, so I have even taken her want's and not given her her way. I'm desperate, someone please help me, oh and yes, she is an excellent honor role student and made varsity fastpitch this past season, she pitches and plays first base, she is a wonderful kid but not with me?
Replied: 10/23/2009 5:55pm.
well at least your daughter excels in school and sports, mine is struggling to catch up with her senior class to make up for all the classes she failed hanging around with other delinquents as a sophmore and junior. i completely relate to the constant yelling and demanding and demeaning tone of voice. my 17 yr old cannot speak to me without being sarcastic, rude, swearing or yelling. about *everything*. i have had it with the verbal abuse because that is what it is. i won't post her whole life story but suffice to say, she hasn't had a perfect childhood but she's had a lot of privileges and love and support and a mom who is there for her every single day of her life, yet all she does is berate me and blame me for being "f----ed up" because I've been a "terrible mother". Huh? Oh and her friends parents and her teachers just adore her. She clearly doesn't cuss and yell at them every second over every little thing (such as, you mentioned, groceries). I always say, pleaes put it on the grocery list if you want it. She never does. Then she rudely complains that we never have XYZ food. So I buy X food. Why didn't I get the Y food? "There's nothing to eat in this freakin house!" You get the picture. It is dumbfounding. I wouldn't have beleived another parent was experiencing this too if I had not read your post!