lonedad's picture

pre -teen and diapers

hi my pre teen likes to wear diapers hes twelve

got any ideas to make him stop?

MRB's picture

It might not be "normal" but it is actually fairly common. In the past parents & the child have been reluctant to speak about the situation publicly. The internet has changed that & there are countless websites on the subject (some are very helpful, others QUITE questionable). At your sons age he most likely gets some sexual gratification from wearing them. Just like if a person was gay or crossdressed or was arroused by feet or whatever, a GOOD counselor would be able to make them feel better about themselves but you can't counsel away a persons sexual make up. You can try behavior modification & unenlightend doctors & counselling, it wont stop him from wearing them. It will make him hide wearing them from you & force him to lie to you about it. It might even give them an added mystique, so the forbidden aspect makes them even more attractive. You can find countless testimonals from teens going through this & adults whose parents went that route. Wikipedia's diaper entry & http://understanding.infantilism.org
are good places to start finding information.
30 years ago I was an almost teenager who liked & wanted to wear diapers. Let him wear them! It's only a diaper! Accept that it is part of who your son is. Don't make them a reason for you to embaress your kid or telling him he's immature. Tell him you'd rather he didnt, but if that's what he wants he can. That way you both can get a little more comfortable with it. he'll be more likely to be more open with talking about his sexual feelings with you & if you arent fixated on it you might be able to give some fatherly guidence into something that interests him more, before he gets fixated on them.

Zales's picture

hey there I'm new to the forms, but as for your kid wanted to wear diapers honestly I don't see a problem with it, I mean think about it the only diffrence between diapers and underpants is that your able to wet one. maybe the child is scared of growing up. or is having trouble accepting things as they are in school or something. I'm not psycologist but I don't think having a liking for a diaper is anything bad. seriously whats wrong with wear a diaper weather your 1, 12, or 120.

TROYF07's picture

you should feel lucky if thats all your 12 yr old is in. be glad its not drugs or something. i say if he wants to wear diapers whether or not its normal let him.

Ranger Dad's picture
Ranger Dad

Wearing a diaper is not what most 12 year old boys do, so no that's not normal.  Being normal is not necessary to growing up healthy and happy.  However, I do think you should consult your doctor to get some feedback from an expert.  Is your son otherwise developing mentally and physically as "normal"

junieg's picture

I would be worried about him getting or keeping friends as this is not in the least 'normal' How does he get on at school and does he have any friendships. He needs some sort of counselling.

miniz74's picture

I disagree with the people who claim that a 12 year old wearing diapers is abnormal. What, as the subject of this post asks, IS normal?

I will speak from my own childhood here. When From when I was six until I was nearly 16, I wet the bed. Not nightly. I would call it 40%-50% of the time. I also day wet at about the same clip until I was close to 10 or so. I had two choices, really. Wet my pants, and subject myself to bullies galore...or wear some form of protection. I chose protection. At first, it wasn't diapers, I wore training-style pants, both day and night. As I got older, however, I switched to adult size diapers (at about age 13 or so). I wore them to bed every night, and to be honest with you, I felt peaceful in them. Like I didn't have a care in the world. Like a baby, I suppose. As for daytime, I would occasionally wear a diaper, but only at home, and only around family (my parents and my sister, all of whom could care a whit what I did so long as it wasn't illegal. They loved me for me). Of course, before I was allowed to do it (wear during the day, I mean), my parents and I had a long talk, and discussed why I wanted to wear them, and set some rules to follow about them.

Now, I ask this. Did wearing diapers as a child, and onward to young adulthood, make me abnormal? I was a straight A+ student, made the High Honor Roll in high school during 3 of my 4 years (I missed a quarter of my sophomore year with mono, and my grades slipped a little). I was a varsity football player, and made All-County three times. I remain the only two-year captain in the history of my school. I also played baseball, though not as well as I did football. I went to college after high school, and graduated a year early with a degree in business. I am now 34 years old, and am a happily married father of two sweet and God sent daughters. As I look back on my childhood, I often ask myself "If I could go back and NOT wear diapers from time to time, would I?" And the answer is...not a chance in hell.

And if either of my daughters, when they are older, express an interest in wearing them, I will tell them it is their decision, not mine. I will, of course, lay down ground rules, like my own parents did for me. Like no wearing in public, don't go around advertising the fact you do it, and if you, ahem, use them, you are responsible for your own clean up.

Lonedad, what I am trying to say to you is this. Talk to your boy. Ask him, honestly, without condemning him right off the bat, why he wants to wear them. In my research, sometimes a child who wants to wear a diaper, especially if they haven't previously showed an interest in them, or if they don't have a medical reason (like I did, I guess) for the usage of them, it may be an indicator towards some other problem. Is he bullied at school? Has he recently gone through a change, a major (or major to him) one. Has someone passed on he that was close to? Your son wanting to wear diapers may simply be a way for him to let you know he's overwhelmed by whatever is going on. I wish you and your son the best of luck.

Best wishes from a former diaper lover,


Bill Barnes's picture
Bill Barnes

Hi! lonedad.
If you set your son down and tell him that wearing diapers at his age is not normal. But that there are usually something causing one to decide to wear diapers or do something which is out of the normal range of behavier. Be calm and let your son know that you wish to discuss his desire to wear diapers. If after a real discussion on the subject,your son decides he still wants to wear diapers. Then you should back him 100%. If he wishes to be treated like a baby then do so as much as possible. But never embaress him about this problem. I because of dicease have had to wear diapers and plastic pants most of my life. I've had to come to terms concerning this problem and dealing with the public. I finally accepted the fact that I have to wear diapers for others sake as well as mine.

Your son does not have to wear diapers but does so because he wishes to. Allow him to do so and most likely he will grow ot od this. But if he does not then what the harm.
This is better by far than doing drugs or something of that nature. Have him go on line and chat with other teens who wear diapers and maybe he and you can sort this out.

chrism46544's picture

hello i am not a parent but medically incontinent due to the lack of oxygen when i was born my bladder and my eyes were not fully developed. I was in your son shoes when i first started to notice i had a problem with accidents. I was ashamed to tell anyone and when i was 14 went to the drug stoe and bought some disposables for the first time my step dad found them and i could not tell him the truth because i did not understand what was going on with my body and could not face it when i was younger did not want to go to the doctor and run tests and find out that i had to wear them in school i just kept it to myself because i allready had it hard enough in school being in special education classes. So i would just talk to him and see if he has a wetting problem and go from there bye for now chrism.

jwdedrick's picture

Chris who said to much O2 at brith caused him to incontint does not know what his talking about. He is just some one who wants to be an adult baby. Thats OK if thats what he wants but he should tell the truthand not lie about it. He has made the same claim on other adult baby wetsites. To much O2 at brith can cause a baby to be blind but not to be come incntinent for life.

junieg's picture

jwededrick, do you know for certain your facts before you write off what someone has said? We are all entitled to have our opinions and ideas listened to. Lack of oxygen at birth can cause a lot more problems than blindness. Perhaps you should do some research and blind us with your knowledge. [sorry, no pun intended]