dpcowboy's picture
dpcowboy

18 yr old has abandooned home for Dad's, off to college

Well, the latest in the saga of AW, the now 18 year old who has the car, promised to work all summer, quit her job halfway through, but managed to avoid me enough (probably why she has spent two nights here this entire summer!):

...and had the temerity to complain about not having gas money last weekend. I informed my wife that I am selling the car as soon as she goes away to college (9/21), and taking AW off of insurance ($2300/year!). My wife says that we should 'keep' the car as a backup. We have two other vehicles, but they are trucks, and my wife does not feel comfortable driving them in her present professional capacity, which I understand.

AW emailed us yesterday, saying that her 'real' Dad, the Disneyland Dad type, has complained about sharing half of her college costs, and wants my wife (mom) to pay for whatever Dad doesn't pay for.
I say "No". My wife says '...maybe" This little minx has already cost me over $20k in the last two years, and I do not like the prospect of funding the next four years of 'culinary' school.

I would like to eliminate the issues altogether, remodeling the house to eliminate AW's bedroom and bathroom, effectively denying her access on 'xmas and spring breaks' and to make the other issues clear in a "straight talk' fashion. AW does NOT want to have that conversation, because she knows she is in the wrong. My wife does NOT want to have the conversation, because she avoids confrontation, except with me, at all costs.

What to do? Help! I have calmly placed the other issues forward in the last year...the result has been prevarication and waffling...and I can't stand it!