heldavison's picture
heldavison

Over Enthusiastic Mother-in-Law

My mother in law and I have a reasonably good relationship. In the past she is seen my her family as controlling and always says 'let me make a suggestion'   Now I appreciate she has the best intentions at heart but sometimes it can be problematic.


My husband and i are expecting a baby in 5 months. This is our first child and the first grandchild.  When staying with my inlaws over Easter she constantly bombarded me with numerous questions - at least 30 in a 6 hour period. Davy and I are so excited about the baby but constant questions re the baby is driving me insane e.g. have you thought of parentcraft classes / are any of your friends pregnant at the same time / what are the worst things you are finding about pregnancy/ have you thought of buying a people carrier - like hello !


 


With an in-law relationship the worst thing is that she treats you like one of her own children but there are none of the feedback mechanisms a child has with her own mother. The net result is frustration. I tried various strategies e.g. saying there is plenty of time to think about baby equipment 8 weeks before baby is born and also tried changing the topic and also attempted to ignor one question like my bro in law and husband di with ALL baby related questions. None of these worked. I am considering limiting contact with her as I honestly am so frustrated with scenario.


 


I appreciate she is just trying to help but to be honest It makes me dread her 'helpful' comments / what access she will want when baby is born and this is very sad.


 


Please help with any useful comments you may have :-)



junieg's picture
junieg

I can appreciate how you feel, but I can also appreciate how she feels. This is her first grandchild and she must be very excited at the prospect, and believe me, once this baby is born you will probably be all too pleased to get all the help and advice you can whenever a problem arises. Sure you can come on here and ask advice, but how much nicer when you have someone who cares so much. It would be a shame if you limited contact with her. I am a granny and I know how it feels [wonderful]