NanaJuli's picture

Aggressive behavior at daycare

My daughter has been in a difficult marriage. She and my adorable grandson lived with my husband and myself from the time he was 6 weeks up until he was 18 months. The three of them have been living together since September 2008.

A few weeks ago there was a physical altercation between my daughter and her husband. My grandson who is almost two was a witness to what happened. My husband drove the three hours to their apartment and brought our grandson back to stay with us. My daughter went to a lawyer and began the process for divorce. The husband left the state and went to live with his parents.

That is the background info! The problem is now our grandson has become very aggressive at daycare, to the point they are talking about asking him to leave. My daughter is working and going to school, so he is not getting a lot of one on one attention. We are taking him every weekend, but that doesn't help the daycare problem during the week. Our hearts are breaking because we love them both so much! My daughter is very independent and gets very defensive when we try to discuss the situation. Does anyone have any advice, I work, but I am willing to take time off if that would help!

acitez's picture

How are things going? I think you have a good understanding of what is going on, but it is difficult figuring out what you can do.

concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

I think having you around more may be a good thing for your grandson. He's young yet, and I'm sure he'll come around, but it's got to be tough for all of you. Be there for one another, and spend as much time w/ your grandson as you can. Also, it's important that his mom spends quality time w/ her son as well. She's doing the right thing going to school and working to support her and her son's future, but at 2 yrs old, your grandson doesn't understand this. He needs his mommy. Also, does your grandson see his father at all or do you talk to him about his father? This has to be a very confusing situation for your grandson. As for daycare, maybe emotionally it's not the right place for him right now. If it's not possible for you or another family member to care for your grandson right now, maybe his mom can consider hiring a nanny. Your grandson needs stability and comfort right now more than anything. Maybe being at home w/ a regular caregiver will give him some feeling of ease. If, however, the behaviors continue, I wld consider counceling for not just your grandson, but also the entire family. I can only imagine how difficult this must be on all of you.