To Seperate or Not
Well, I have a question. I have been married for 10 yrs - all normal work money for spouse and I has been joint and has paid all our bills. We have had many losses in the past few years - 2 miscarriages and a Full term loss - to which 3 wks later I caught him cheating on me. My spouse has tried for years to get a business up and running and it has paid for itself in years past, but this year it is not and we are now using "our" money to pay his rent, utilities, truck payment, credit card payments that have nothing to do with our family - so to speak (no bills we ran up). When he does side work - he feels he should keep all the money to put back into the business - so why is our joint regular money paying for it then? Our kids have a home, are fed, have clothes but nothing extra, nor do I - at all - actually am hurting from it. I take care of the kids ALL the time and work 25 hrs a week and they are with me then too. We don't have money for us to go out, we don't share the same bed, we don't talk like friends - but he thinks nothing is wrong? I feel like I have either 100% grown out of loving him, or I may just not know how to love because of the losses I may have put up a berrier (?). Either way, after the funeral for our daughter - and his cheating, we sold our home and have been renting since. This landlord took all the money and never paid the mortgage so it is in strict foreclosure - his family said us 5 could move into their home and try to save, but I but heads with the mom - and really don't think that would be such a hot idea - not sure if this is the time to find my own place with the 3 kids and seperate from spouse until he finds a way to either make the business run, or finds a way to pay for it without it effecting the rest of us and hope he finds the fire again between the two of us, or if I should bite the bullet, move in with in-laws and save as much as I can and see what happens? Oh and if WE decide to find another rent - we can't afford it because we are paying for the garage plus the truck plus all the credit cards he rang up. HELP Watched the kids tonight play in the yard we have been in for 10 yrs, and cried my eyes out - that this will be there last summer here. We can't get a mortgage (I certainly can't with my little 1400 month income, and the mr. is on workmans comp now).