Dunphy's picture

Should I take custody of my daughter after 8 years

Hello. My name is Marie and I have an 8 year old daughter. I'm not what you would call mother material. I'm not on drugs or anything , I just love to travel and have fun and I'm not very responsible. So when my daughters dad and I split up . we both agreed it would be better if she lived with him. I saw her every few months or so. I felt bad that I wasn't there but I guess it kind of worked for everyone.

Sadly a few months ago , my ex passed away and obviously it's left my daughter devestated.Right now she is living with her grandparents , which is where she used to spend the afternoon when her father would work. I don't know if I should take her to live with me or not. I want to try and be a better mom to her but part of me is scared that I'm going to screw it up because my own mother made my life a living hell and I don't want to do the same thing. And also I'm not sure if I'm the best thing for her or not. She knows me and loves it when I'm around but at the same time she's comfortable with her granddparents but they are quite elderly. I don't know what to do ? I'd really appreciate some advice.

almondeyes's picture
Your in-laws are elderly and sooner or later they will not be able to care for your daughter. It is not easy raising kids. But if you have enough love in you, you will be able to care for your child. Your experience with your mother already taught you what you do not want to be as a mother. We all go through self doubt whether we are good parents. There is no hard fast rule on how to raise kids. I think that everybody is capable of being a good parent. You have to be 100 per cent committed. It is normal to fear failure. There is no such thing as being a perfect parent.