Chris56794's picture
Chris56794

need advice for dealing with neighbor girl

I have 11 yr old twin girls. There's a neighbor girl, same age, that they used to play with, but never really had much in common with. And honestly--she's incredibly annoying. Not mean or rude, just spoiled and bossy and very immature for her age. Only child used to getting her way with everything. She had stopped coming over and calling for quite a while, but now she's back with a vengeance. She called probably about 2 dozen times in two days at the beginning of christmas break and we ignored her calls. She came over and I finally told her that this was christmas break and I wanted to spend time with my kids; that was the most polite thing I could think of to get rid of her. So we didn't hear from her as much the rest of the break, but amazingly she still did call some. Now they're back in school, and she's calling again, and came over once already. We're back to pretending we're not home, but can't keep that up forever. My kids just simply don't want to play with her. I feel sorry for her, but do I really have to force my kids to play with her anyway just to be polite? She's annoys me to death too I'm afraid. The only other girl in the neighborhood her age doesn't want to play with her either. Any way to politely deal with the situation? I really don't want to have to tell her or her parents that my kids just don't want to play with her. Her parents are sweet, but don't really have a clue--honestly who lets their kid call someone during christmas break 2 dozen times in two days? I



chjmk's picture
chjmk
You may have lost your objectivity. It isn't your problem, it's your kid's problem to solve. Have you asked them how they feel? What don't they like about her? Is it a problem during play that could be fixed? Whatever it is, there's a healthy way to deal with conflict and communication... and "hiding" to pretend you aren't home isn't going to solve anything. It's actually cruel to this girl and in the end it is going to teach your kids to hide from communication and be dishonest-- even though that is not what you intend. Teach your kids to answer the phone and do their own "dirty" work, my mother would have called it. It is perfectly fine to say "I don't want to play today/I'm watching a movie with my sister", ect... Remember at age 11, friendships flux ALOT. One week they're friends, the next not. Be wise and be kind-- these people are your neighbors and you have to live together for who knows how long.