Fostermom's picture

My six year old still poops his pants

My son is six . He still poops his pants. He did have a bowel problem from birth, but it almost seems like he uses that as an excuse to poop in his pants. I feel like because I am divorced from his Dad, that it might be attention seeking or regression type behaviour. His Dad has a girlfriend with two children in diapers. It seems to have gotten worse since they came into the picture.
Foster used to get very constipated, was on daily laxatives. His father wanted him to stop the laxatives, so we stopped them. He since hasn't seemed to get very backed up. We discovered recently he is afraid of the toilet, so we had another get to know the toilet day & he seemed fine. Then when I called him while he was at his Dads, he reported that he had pooped in his pants.
One of my main issues with this also is that when Foster has an accident, he often will just sit in it, or sleep in it, and try to hide it. He lies to us frequently. I have explained to Foster that having an accident gets worse when he doesn't go and cleanhimself up. He doesn't understand that sitting in poops all day at school, is dirty and will make him sick, with a rash or otherwise.
We have approached this from every angle for years it seems. We hVe seen Drs, had him on laxative, taken him off milk products, looked at it as a behavioual problem. We have rewarded him plenty for keeping his underwear clean, praised him constantly when he has a good stretch of days.
His Dad is no help & thinks I am being cruel by making Foster conquer his fear of the toilet last week... Then be went to his Dads... I asked his Dad to work on this with him, he didn't. Foster came back again pooping in his pants. How do I change his behaviour in fifty percent of the time due to our custody agreement?!
I realize this is a flustered post. I'm not usually this disjointed in my writing. I'm very frustrated... Help!!!!!