marywest's picture
marywest

FEAR OF DEATH

hi everyone

glad to find this wonderful massage board to discuss my problems which annoy me always

ok,i am 25 years old,i am not sick nor i lose anyone but it is nearly 4 months that i cant stop thinking about death and after that.Every night i unconsciously think about death and then i afraid so much so i cant sleep or sleep with nightmare.I live with my mother and father and i meet my friends only 2 or 3 times in one week so i think lonleyness is one of the reasons and when my bad feelings grow fast i think it is because my monthly priods(i dont have priods for 2 months)

i am looking for job and i have lots of mental pressure.

can someone help me,please ? is anybody else with this feelings ?

thanks so much in advance for your help



concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

I'm not a doctor, but if you're having these feelings, maybe you're going through some form of anxiety. Do you think you cld be depressed? Does depression run in your family?
At 25 yrs old, it's common for people to look for jobs, search for meaningful relationships and settle down in their lives. This can be a very stressful time, especially if the person is feeling pressured or if things aren't going exactly as planned.
You need to try and relax, and take things one step at a time. Your life will fall into place when the time is right.
As for the feelings of death, you said you're not sick and you haven't experienced a loss. You also said you feel lonely. Could this be linked to inadequate feelings you have towards yourself?
You mentioned too that your periods are irregular. I've heard of women going through menopause having thoughts of death, but I never heard of this at age 25. I suppose it cld be a hormonal problem, but again I'm not a dr.
You said you've been getting these feelings for the last 4 mos. Have you ever felt like this before? I'm wondering if you maybe experienced something traumatic during your life that's causing these feelings to surface now. It cld be a subconscious thing.
I wld suggest, first and foremost, talking to a psychologist about these feelings. I wld also mention this to your gynocologist to see if it may be linked to a hormonal problem. You can maybe consider a birth control pill to help regulate your periods.
Overall, take care of your health first. Don't worry about the job or relationships right now. Those things will all fall into place eventually. Please keep us posted on how you make out.

marywest's picture
marywest

thank you for replying
a few hours ago i heard that i passed MA exam
i am so happy
you see i was also worried about my exam result
i fill an online anxiety test and it shows that my anxiety is very high
i think my negative feelings will be better when i go vacation in summer and also trying to be relax
do you think my negative feelings will get better or not ?

concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

I don't know if your negative feelings are linked towards your anxieties or something else. I can only guess. I think the vacation away w/ time to relax is a great idea. If, however, when you return home, you start experiencing these feelings again, or if these feelings don't go away even when you're on vacation, you shld consider seeing a therapist. Many times, vacation is just what someone needs, but at other times, it cld act as a distraction from the stresses of everyday life that will still be there when that person gets back. It's all in how you look at situations and also how you choose to handle them. I'm happy to hear you passed your MA exam. That's great! Take a deep breath, and try to take things one step at a time. Try not to worry so much. I know that's easier said then done sometimes, but the way I look at it is this. Life is too short. Try to focus on the positive. Good luck!

marywest's picture
marywest

hi again
i want to ask a question
i always try to solve problems and anxiety in my mind completely but you know we never can solve a problem like fear of death completely because we dont know its all aspects
do you think it is better i dont think about it at all(if possible think about something else) or find answer and solution to my bad feelings ?
thank you again for replying

pokey's picture
pokey

It does sound like you may be experiencing anxiety attacks. If it is, anxiety disorders are common and there's lots of help out there.


For that, get yourself to a doctor and get a referral to someone who deals with panic and anxiety disorders. It could be you need the help of anti-anxiety meds to get rid of the obsessive thoughts.


It also may help to:
Exercise more,
Reduce caffeine and alcohol intake, if it applies,
Eat healthy, in general, and
Yes, do spend more time with friends.


A last thought, however: You stated that you have suffered for almost 4 months with this. Sleep deprivation alone is not good for a person. And since you are not sleeping well due to these thoughts, I would seek help. We are not doctors here, so it is best to go to one to be sure you know what it is you have and the best treatment for it.


You deserve to feel better.

concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

I agree completely. See a dr, even if you're feeling somewhat better. If this is anxiety, it can come and go, and it's hard to control. You can try not to think about things like death, or other stresses of life, but you can't avoid every difficult situation. Maybe remove yourself from those situations that you can control, but get help to face the ones that you need to face in everyday life. Does that make sense? I hope you find a dr to help you. Keep in touch if you need any more advice or have any other questions.

marywest's picture
marywest

thanks everyone
as i said after the good results of MA exam
i feel better
i plan for a vacation next month and if after that i have bad feelings again i will go to doctor but at the moment i try not to think about negative feelings
i try also to strengthen my faith and find it useful
i tell you about my feelings in future,THANK YOU

marywest's picture
marywest

hi everyone
i come back and i did it ,i overcome my bad feelings and now i am alright
just want to say thank you very much all of you for your answers and advices

concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

So glad you're feeling better. Take things one day at a time. Be well.

Debbiedoo's picture
Debbiedoo

Marywest-
I just got done reading all the message boards about you. It's great to hear that you are better. I just wanted to say a little something about myself. I just turned 27 and have thought of death myself. Just thinking and knowing that one day, yes someday my Mom and Dad will go on. And that soon because of her age and health that my Grandma will pass away too. I'm getting a little choked up right now. But, I do think about it. Probably, more than the average person. When I was in my teens' I had depression and what you call bipolar (a type of depression) which made me think of death. I don't think of that type of death anymore though because of my medications and treatments. But, you don't sound like what I went through. You (I am not a Dr., like the others said) probably need to spend more time with friends and also like they said to a physchologist to talk about what you've been feeling.It helps. It really does. I have been to one before. I'm a shy person so it was hard for me to talk first but then it got better.I also started to join a Y.M.C.A to exercise and I'm still there since 2001'.Exercise really helps your mood and you can meet other people there like I did. Anyway, sorry I'm rambling but I just wanted you to know that you are not the only one out there and if you need to chat then I'm here to chat with. Take Care.