fedup's picture
fedup

they just dont listen!!

Im divorced, have 2 boys aged 6 and 4.
I am currently in a new relationship.
After my divorce, which was a nightmare, I felt
sorry for my kids for putting them through this, and I wanted them to feel loved. Big mistake!!
Now they just walk right over me!
Back chatting, disobey rules and just plain do what they want to. Now the Problem left the house when the oldest went to school.There he does the same.
Im at my last resort here!
Ive done the time out and took away things they like, and even tried talking to them, but 5 seconds later they went on
WHAT SHOULD I DO???
is it to late to save them??



mayamay's picture
mayamay
How much time do you spend interacting with your kids each day? What does that time look like?
junieg's picture
junieg
You say they don't listen but do you REALLY listen to them.
fedup's picture
fedup
More than enough,I would say, I work till Lunchtime and fetch them at school and go home. We spend the rest of the day in each others company. in that time we do homework, and i do ask them how their day went, Is it not enough???
fedup's picture
fedup
Yes i think i listen to what they have to say, how do you think should i listen?
mayamay's picture
mayamay
I'm glad you have enough time with them. I remember being a mom of young children and when my kids were in school during the day, it felt like every time I spoke to them I was telling them to hurry and get something done. I worked a part-time job that was in the evening and on weekends, so we didn't do anything fun. That's probably an exaggeration, but that really is what I remember. They will be more likely to listen if sometimes you are saying things they want to hear.
KIDDYDAD's picture
KIDDYDAD
Ma, do you honestly expect a 6-year old to be rational? Candidly, your boys are likely to perceive your new man as encroaching on their dad's territory. What other way to express their resentment, other than by disobeying all your instructions. Give up on them? not an option here! Keep up the fight for their heart, the older they get...rationality begins to creep in. Best of luck ma.
sallyinmiami7's picture
sallyinmiami7
Dear fed up. It will get better:) Hang in there, there aren't enough hours in the day so you can be able to listen,love, discipline,love again and at the same time produce. If you have a chance to pay a baby sitter at least once in the month; Do, and take time off for yourself. This way they don't always see you stressed out. I found after raising 4 on my own that kids do feel our vibe so if they feel you stressed out they don't know how to handle stress is not natural to kids they do play and relax more naturally than you and I. Take care, Sally
Old school father's picture
Old school father
From the big ending when humans had kids they spanked there kids. Every person of interest in history was spanked by there parents. I don't understand the thoughts behinds changing this it works. Try it!
junieg's picture
junieg
You are obsessed with violence towards children, that is very worrying. Why would you use every thread to advocate violence towards them. Get some help please old school father.
jimcrich's picture
jimcrich
re: is it to late to save them?? jim: not if you get busy CORRECTING your parenting mistakes. re: WHAT SHOULD I DO??? jim: see a therapist or counselor ASAP about your FAILURES as a parent and learn how to HELP your kids.