filipinachick94's picture
filipinachick94

Daughter is Rebellious? Help?

About 6 or more months ago my daughter skipped school 6 times.
A couple of those times were with her boyfriend. They most likely went to his house or mine.

Because she is a straight A student, doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, we like her boyfriend, she never has done anything like this..etc.
Me and My husband DID NOT punish her. We let it go.
We just asked her boyfriend to please respect the fact that I don't want him in my house if he was not welcomed by parents first.
I always asked him to make sure my daughter did not skip again.

This was around Nov-December.

Around January my daughters boyfriend told her that he cheated during the summer.
She was very hurt and broke up with him.
For 4 months he worked his *** off to win her back and do what he could to make up for his disrespect to her.
She agreed and allow them to go to back to being great friends.

My husband and I told my daughter that she is not allowed to date or be with gabriel. since he hurt her. We did not approve of him at all! A man who disrespects my daughter does not deserve her.
She fought against it.

NOW.. In the month of April... My daughter confessed to my husband and I that she did skip again. It was one time with her boyfriend. She brought him to MY house. She said it was due to stress from school, since her school is pretty heavy with work.

I flipped. I banned her from ever seeing this boy again. Friend and Boyfriend. I don't even want her making contact with him at school! He disrespected my family twice by skipping school with my daughter and coming into my house unwelcome by me. Especially after I made a packed with him on respect.

I told her that she will never be with him while she lives under my house. I even made it so she is to be away all summer with her Grandmother. No phone or laptop while she is there. So she will have 0 contact with her boyfriend or friends. I grounded her to an extreme as well. She is too never leave this house unless she is too go to school. I drive her to school. If I find out she is making contact with this boy.. Her punishment will be worse.

Now there is a lot more in it. Hence his family stepped in criticizing the way I'm punishing my daughter and that just made me hate his family along with him. For a whole month my family has been going through fights every night and talks. My daughter looks as if she is becoming depressed. She cries to sleep every night and STILL talks to the boy. One time a fight got so bad that I told her to not come home for the night and she ended up staying at her boyfriends house. THE ONE PLACE I HATE.

The cops came and everything. She doesn't seem to understand that she is the child and I am the parent. I could care less whether she has been with this boy for 2 years or not. I could care less if they are best friends. I care that they both disrespected my house hold and what I asked for. I care that this boys family keeps trying to tell me how to raise my kids? This isn't about my daughter getting straight A's, and not drinking or smoking. This isn't about the fact that her girlfriends are all pretty head strong people. This isn't about the fact that she does community service and knows exactly what she wants to do in her future.

This is about respect. She tells me I'm extreme. But I feel as if I'm doing what's right. She tells her friend about wanting to hurt herself because of feeling like a trapped animal who has no say or rights.

Me and my husband also placed a tracker on her phone, have a continuous record of all her chats and texts...

This boy just won't listen to staying away from our daughter! We asked politely and we asked harshly to his parents and the boy to just stay away. My daughter is to have 0 contact. My husband and I despise the family. AM I WRONG? Because apparently for the past month.. this has gotten NOWHERE.



filipinachick94's picture
filipinachick94

by the way. they are both 16 and about to be juniors in high school.

Starbust's picture
Starbust
Sometimes the school plays a big role when it comes to molding a person. Have you noticed that some parents really want their child to get into a certain school because they know that when their child is there, they are secured that their child will be in a good hand. Since she is 16 and going to college soon i suggest you enroll her to a boarding school..
teachers's picture
teachers
I am betting she is having sex and thinks she is "grown up". Both of you should seeing a Marriage and Family therapist ( together )for at least 10 sessions.