mummie's picture
mummie

5 year old too cheeky and wont do as she is told...MBeth?

Hi

Unfortunately I typed one out and lost the whole lot !!!

Wondered if anyone could help, I am new to these boards and need some help I am especially interested in hearing from MBeth aswell as anyone else who can offer advice. I added to a thread earlier today and realised afterwards MBeth might have had a website but that was a 2007 post.

Anyway I'll cut it as short as I can, my 5 year old daughter has always been strong willed and very headstrong in everything shes ever done. She was actually running rather than walking at 1 year of age as soon as she has mastered something she is onto the next very quickly.

Which brings me full circle, she is getting so much for me now I am struggling, she started school last year and has since got worse. She has attitude 'So what, take my toy away' etc, I am sure I am suffering a lot more than her in this what seems a power struggle. She wont do as she is told, and answers me back in a sarcastic horrible shrug shoulder I dont care manner when I ask her to do something. It has happened very fast in the last few months and I am at my wits end.

Wondered if anyone could help. I dont do the smacking, the boredom sitting in the middle of the floor doesn't work now as she is crafty and fidgets the whole time eventually ending up the other side of the room if I am not looking. She doesn't listen to me or my explanations when I tell her off.

I feel as though I am being blind to it at the moment, I feel there is a simple answer here but I just cant think for worrying.

I possibly worry more about her becomming a teen and getting a lot worse than this, I kinda want to nip it in the bud and stop the attitude while she is young. Its got worse in the last 3 months, there have been no changes as home and ruled everything else out.

 

With my son I knew his weaknesses, with her its a battle...

 

Thanks in advance x



jkrag's picture
jkrag

Have you read the book, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk? It's a classic in working with children and I think would be very helpful to you. Keep in mind that having a strong parent-child relationship is not something that can be developed quickly. Just like learning a new computer program you wouldn't expect to immediately have total success. Each child is slightly different and we as parents need to learn specific skills to help us.

Jim

mummie's picture
mummie

Hi Jim

Thanks, I will try anything at the moment ;-)

concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

There's also the book 1-2-3 Magic that's helped us. You shldn't have to have arguments w/ your kids. Nip things in the bud before you get frustrated. Find things that wld really encourage your daughter to change her behavior. Obviously taking a toy away is not working. What if she has a playdate or a bithday party to go to? Tell her she can't go, and mean it. Stop doing things for her or don't give in to her for anything. Let her realize that if she doesn't respect you, she gets no respect back. You don't have to get into a power struggle b/c you're the boss. Put your foot down, stick to your decisions, and be consistent always! I hope this helps.