myboysmom's picture
myboysmom

adjustment to kindergarten

I am a stay @ home mom with 3 great boys ages 11,5,and 2.  All 3 of my boys are very attached to me almost clingy.  Recently, my 5 year old started kindergarten, he has never been to daycare or preschool.  The first few days were great, then by the middle of the second week the problems started he tried to leave the cafeteria.  He was sent to the principles office and I was called in for a conference, the teacher then explained she was having some difficulty with my son she said that he was not giving her eye contact and that he was having trouble hearing her.  She also said he would wander around the room aimlessly. She was also concerned because when she asked him to do something he would refuse and cross his arms and grunt at her.  We discussed good behavior at home with the hopes of better days and grounded him from tv and computer, then he was better for a few days, then he got sick and missed 2 days of school things just seemed to get worse He would fight me over going to school .He would take his clothes off when I would put them on or take his seatbelt off One day we were 45 min late for school. Now he has started mistreating the other students,he had one episode where he hit a child in the face and another time when he wiped his dirty kleenex on someone,the teacher has sent him to the office for these offenses and when she sends him to the office he gets very upset and has had to be restained by the teacher for hurting himself by running into the walls and biting himself, now they want to have him tested for learning disabilities and autism, but they will not begin the testing till the middle of the month and it takes 3 months to complete, how do i help him adjust until we have a diagnosis



concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

Maybe this school is not the right place for him. My son is 5, and he has some learning and behavior problems. How's your son's speech and comprehension? Also, how's his behavior at home? In my son's case, he was getting over stimulated being in a large class size. We placed him in a spec ed class (now w/ only 5 other kids), and he's doing so much better. The teacher/ student ratio has made a big difference for him. We still don't have an exact diagnosis yet, but w/ the right help, he's making great progress. My son was also tested for autism which can usually be detected around 3 yrs old. We were told he's not even on the spectrum.
You're doing the right thing taking the first step in helping your son. Get him evaluated as soon as you can. We took our son to a Developmental Pediatrician who has been monitoring his progress ever since. Through her recommendations, we've been able to get our son the appropriate services he needs.
I wish you all the best in this process.

myboysmom's picture
myboysmom

Thanks for taking the time to let me know your story. I'm glad your son is doing better in a small setting. Im am going to suggest this to my son's principle, she has said that she thinks that he too is being over stimulated in the classroom. She said that they were going to start giving him small breaks away from the classroom next week to see how that helps, he has 17 other children in his classroom.
We did have a couple of good weeks where we thought that he was adjusting well and now he has taken a few steps back.We still are waiting for the tests to be completed, they have 60 days to complete them.
In the meantime I am going to look into a developmental pediatrician.My dr has just said to wait for the tests he hasn't had any suggestions other than punish and reward! I need more than that.
My son had a speech delay and has been going to speech since he was 3. His behavior at home has always been pretty good but I have had 2 major episodes that were pretty upsetting Both of those happened outside of the home in crowded places.
Its just so fustrating not knowing how to help your child and to have the other kids in his class tell you how bad your son behaved in class today when you know how good your son really is !!!

concerned mom's picture
concerned mom

I can truly relate to you. Keep me posted on how things go w/ your son. Take things one step at a time. It's a process, so be patient. It's ok to be concerned, but also try to remain positive. Help is out there, and you're on the right track to doing what's best for your son.